She's Got Big Balls, I've Got Big Balls

So, as you know, the shit hit the fan.

My Dad's wife and I had declared war and it wasn't pretty.

Then it happened. She got balls way bigger then mine and of course managed to be a bit less stubborn.

We were like Ebony and Ivory. I was so relieved to have the family battle come to an end.

Apologies were made and accepted all around. The celebrating began.

Of course when the news reached CNN and Fox News, the world began to celebrate with us.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh.......I am so relieved. I guess I can stop the binge drinking and shooting up heroin, popping xanax and of course beating my children and my pets.

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Getting Started

This will be my first blog. I am copying the big brother. Seems like I did that a lot growing up. A little background first. I am the only girl in a family of three kids. We are all grown with our own children and still (even being almost 31) that weirds me out. When did we become adults and what exactly does that mean. We still tease,poke, and prod each other. The funny thing? Now it feels like there is so much love behind it. It seems like we all except each other for our similarities and our differences. Maybe that is what makes us adults. Who knows .

Penis juice and vodka

We have one more week of school here, yet my children have already disconnected the brain switch. I hate to tell them but we will home school throughout the summer. Luckily for them we can get our work done in less then two hours with only three kids and of course the fact that I sneak projects in throughout our everyday activities. Ethan decided he is exempt from the school dress ode because school is almost out and the daughter has jumped on that band wagon. I decided to let it slide. I figure a cute little t-shirt isn't going to ruin any one's grades, they were all turned in on the 24Th, so we will see if I get a call from the school. So today's little golden nugget of delight is brought to you by Ethan. Mom:Ethan, quit messing with your business. Go to your room if you want to do that. Ethan: I am not messing with it, it hurts. It feels like I am going to bleed when I pee. Mom: Oh honey, I am sorry but you will have to go to your Dad. He is in charge of penises. I handl...

THE AMAZING RACE

I had never watched this show until the season with the "little person". That immediately caught my attention. I have watched The Amazing Race faithfully since then. Last night was the two-hour season premiere. There are two very interesting teams this time. One is a former POW with his girlfriend and the other....Rob and Amanda from survivor!!! Awesome. Everyone is pissed though. They all keep making comments about how they do not deserve to be there because they have already won. I think it is great that they are there. They do not have any kids. They have already won money to pay those pesky bills, why not see the world while they have the chance. I would. I hope they win, just to piss everyone else off. They could be reality TV junkies and go on every show. Next....American Idol? HA HA HA

Poop, Paxil, and Pageantry

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