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Running out of things to do.....send entertainment, but not vaginas!

Well, the playroom is now full of boxes. the house is packed. I will finish cleaning tomorrow. That leaves me two weeks where I need something to do to beat the "missing Clint" blues.


My friends here have been so great. Shhhhhhhhhhh....don't tell them though.

I can not sleep. I miss Clint. I knew I would miss him, but it hurts my chest I miss him so much. He is doing good and I know we are blessed being able to chat everyday or nearly everyday on the computer. they did not have that kind of luxury in wars past.

I watch the news and I am afraid. I am afraid of all the caos and what that will mean to my family. I know that sounds selfish, but My family is my "A" #1 priority.

Now if you have made past all the wah wah whiney shit, you get to hear some funny vagina stories.

So, my children have not yet been taught to be embarassed by their bodies and have no clue that vaginas and penises really aren't for everyone to see or discuss. Okay, so the stories....
first...The kids are all in the tub. Playing, laughing and having a great time. mommy is reading some blogs and then it starts. This crazt giggle.
It was some sort of wild giggle I had never really heard from Emily before. I figure I better go to investigate. Usually too much laughter means they are being naughty. I walk in and Emily looks up and me and says, in a sweet, innocent little voice "Steven is tickeling my Vagina with his toes." Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm....Okay Mom how are you going to handle this one? I quickly responded with,"well, brothers and sisters do not touch each others vaginas and penises....okay?!?!!?" They seemed fine with that response and went on to play something else. Oh Dear God....Help Me.

Okay Vagina story number two. I am on the computer( suprise,suprise) and Emily is sitting on the floor playing with tanner, the ten year old cocker spaniel. Again with the giggle....i look over and Tanner is sniffing all over Emily's crotch. Sha says," Tanner likes my vagina". My response...."Dogs do not play with your vagina either". I kind of thought teaching them proper names and telling them noone was allowed to touch their boy and girl parts was pretty responsible parenting. I did not know I needed to be quite so specific. No one....no brothers, no dogs........
OH CLINT, PLEASE COME HOME!!!! THE MADNESS HERE!!!!

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